our little mermaid purses

what would life be like if we had nothing to hide?

and don't skew this... i say "hide" the same way i mean "possess"- insomuch as we need the things no one can know about us to BE us. the world of celebrity today makes pornography of their daily lives. on twitter we can let the world know at all times where we are, what we are doing, and who we are doing it with. and it is a shame really. what would a life be like without secrets?

we couldn't conceal that we don't like certain christmas presents. my grandmother gives me something i hate every year. i mean, like i HATE it. i don't know why she actually goes and spends money on a red and purple paisley pashmina i gave to salvation army, or a two dollar chinatown purse she got at T.J. Maxx, to which in my knowledge i never remember expressing i wanted. ever. but every year, i write her thank you notes, thanking her to all ends for the shit she gave me, when all she really needed to do was cut me a check for the amount she spent on them.

or, or.... what about children? i teach kids. and if i told them what my life was really like in my down time when they asked me, they would all turn out to be bigger reprobates and whores than if i didn't give them a head start. "miss kathryne, what do you have to do to be a famous dancer or actor?" the appropriate thing to say is, "well, anything can be achieved with a proper work ethic and determination. just keep trying, little timmy." but the truth is, "kid, if you wanna be famous and make millions, you need to sleep your way to the top, marry someone with millions, and make sure the prenup has more holes in it than britney spears' diaphragm." but if i said that, what would their parents think? surely they aren't telling them the secrets they have in their own marriages. why should i have to be chastised?

the thing is, we all have things we need for ourselves. a bubble bath, a secret crush, a mystery about our lives that no one else can touch. most times, that's all we have in this world. everything else can come crashing down around us. but not our glass boxes. they remain glistening and finger-print free. a shred of sanity in our overexposed lives.

and if you think you don't have any secrets, well, fuck you and the horse you trotted in on. i'll burn your pedestal and punch you in the face. every person in the world has a secret, no matter if it's calling your girlfriend the same name you called the girlfriend beforehand or the fact that you stole those glasses from a streetmarket in san francisco when no one was looking.

i know. i may not know what your hiding, but i know it's something, and i commend you.

conceal away, people.

k.