Tuesday, February 16, 2010

pretty little things

i guess you're right; i
guess we're better off
dead in the water, cause
you can't take my jokes, and
i can't take you're
disposition... i
always expected the worst
but thought the best, those
blue eyes coddled my
best intentions like
a blanket to chills.
i don't want this, this
shattered this, this
bruised this... especially
when it's replacing
a this that was better
than all of of this
ever was or could be.
maybe we kept
each other safe,
from each other, and
that's why we held on
so long. the
necklace was pretty,
the roses, unforgettable, but
flowers die too quick, wither
like our insides
trying to build walls
before the sun gets
too hot.
the sun got too hot.
the sun got too hot.
and now bridges
are burning, everywhere.

life is a beach. literally, a vast unknown of kabillions of grains of sand, washed away by the ever changing tide. well, this tide is crashing the shore with a vengeance, and wreaking havoc on everything i thought could one day be solid. up, down, up, down, up down, up... there has to be both to be sane, right? right. right? you don't know the good unless there's bad, because good would have no meaning without it's arch nemesis. and i know this. i know this... i know this. some of my jokes aren't funny, some of the shit i do isn't fair, and some of who i am is crippled. but that doesn't mean i'm totally broken beyond repair, right? and who says i want to be repaired at all? maybe i like being broke. maybe i don't think i need to be fixed. maybe i just want someone to love everything wrong about me and discard all the pretty i make on a day to day basis.

maybe the pretty is what's wrong with all of us... maybe we search too hard for that, and lose all the things that make us who we are. pretty is easy. pretty is everywhere. pretty is nice and comforting and complacent.

but growth happens in the uncomfortable, and makes us into the pretty we find right before we're gone. maybe pretty isn't that pretty at all. maybe pretty is what makes us all so ugly in the end.

it's been a bad day. but that just means its arch nemesis is just around the corner.


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